The Turning Point On Awakening

And though, so this turning point, turning a corner within yourself begins to take place, built on that simple truth about where you are relative to where you sense your life really needs to be. It can be an experience of a convergence of truths, okay? All sorts of things can be expiring in your life—meaning commitments or, um, obsessions or interests and hobbies—and all of this They can be expiring, those things you just can’t do anymore. They can be expiring all at once.

And so this begins a process of deep evaluation and reckoning with where you are now, and a search. Because now you’re searching for that felt-but-not-yet-seen point out in the distance that has your name on it, to which you now need to move. And this search can last a long time or a short time. I know for me it lasted a very short time. But it did happen; it did most definitely. But for some others it can last a very long time. And yet this search is meant to lead to a discovery.

PS: Yeah. And you know, at this juncture, you may find yourself looking back. And what you may find yourself feeling is you can’t go back. And that’s very prominent at this stage. Ah, it’s past you, now. It’s gone by, you know. So, it’s a rather naked moment, umm. And all you know is that you need to go on. And umm, so, yeah.

RS: You know, I think the way we might feel this turning point is on the topic of freedom. We need the freedom from certain things that have dominated our life up to that point or held us back. And we need freedom for certain things, for the things that really matter in our greater life. And so we seek freedom from certain things and that can take the form of rebellion, ah it can take many different challenging forms. And then the freedom for, which is we sense that there is something greater, deeper, more pervasive than what we have been taught to believe in through society, through religion, and in our own families.

There is something more to this life. And as we seek that out a sense of Presence may grow, a sense that you’re not alone. Again, a sign that this is not just you going through some sort of psychological shift. This is actually you being reached by a greater set of powers. And so I know during this turning-point time the sense of Presence, or that something or someone is with you, and there’s a sense of calm and reassurance, almost like a quality, a deep quality of Home, that you’re not so far from Home within yourself, can come over your experience. (PS: Yeah)

And in part, I think this is because the turning point is a risky time, you know. Which side of the fence will you fall on? You’re up on the fence now, and you’re teetering and wavering and the wind is blowing, right? You’re trying to get over that fence. You’re trying it. You can’t really jump the fence, you climb over the fence—it’s a really big fence. (chuckle/laugh) And you stand at the top of the fence for a little while and then you have to climb down somehow. And so while we’re up there teetering, it’s vulnerable. And we may make the mistake of trying to tell everyone else about this and basically get the approval and the assurance of others because we’ve relied on that our whole life. Our whole life has been built upon doing what others say is the thing to do and gaining the approval and the recognition and the love and support that comes by confirming what others value, by doing it ourselves. And now we try to get that same kind of approval and we get disapproval. We get doubt. And we don’t know who to turn to. So it’s, it’s there are risks at that time. And I think the Presence of those Unseen Powers that watch over our lives come[s] to give us the strength and the courage to press on.  

PS: And the truth is that at this moment, at this point in time, you’re standing on the fence; you’re looking back; you can’t go back, and you’re just teetering there. And then the consent emerges, which is to say, “I will go on.” Just that. That’s about all you’re capable of is whether you say it or think it or not, that usually, often you may find will be your next act, which is to go on, which is to send a signal back: I’m going on, I’m going on, you know.

And it’s an uncommon time it’s almost like we’ve often… Marshall’s used the um metaphor of the trapeze artist you know. The trapeze artist, swinging the trapeze out, standing on their perch, swinging it out, catching it, swinging out on the trapeze and releasing it to catch another. And there’s that moment in, that in-between moment, you know. And I think it’s a reset of our orientation because what was our orientation will not be our orientation going forward— something shifted. Our orientation is coming from somewhere else now, you know.

RS: I know maybe for you it also felt something like what we call no-man’s land, you know, which is that gap between two territories, right? And you’re out there and it feels really empty and void and uncertain, insecure. And I think there are those periods in this turning-point time when you really don’t know what you’re doing. But something has to push you through that; something carries you on. And that really is the spiritual power within you, the very thing that’s beginning to awaken in your life. The very thing that’s starting to emerge out of the shell is the thing that gives you the confirmation that I am doing what I know I need to do. I must do this. I cannot fall back asleep.